Don’t Cancel Kindness
There’s no shortage of social media posts these days that can make you want to bang your head against a wall. A few days ago, I saw a graphic posted that showed the phrase “Be Kind” x-ed out and replaced with “Be Anti-Racist, Be Anti-Sexist…” This pretty much stopped me in my tracks. What I felt wasn’t anger or offense; it was sadness.
My thinking went something like this…
Ok, fine. Let’s all work to be anti-racist and anti-sexist, but when did kindness become problematic?
Let me be clear. Cancelling kindness can never be anything other than destructive. If we want to achieve progress against evil, this is NOT the way. It is impossible to stand against evil when we have lost sight of goodness. Kindness and justice are not mutually exclusive.
“If we only know what we are against, and not what we are for, we will quickly lose our way.”
Here’s another way to look at it. How can you be anti-racist if you only oppose a problematic system but don’t actually love the individual affected by the system? In that case, your anti-racism would be meaningless.
Jesus gave us a very clear path forward, and it’s strikingly simple. A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. (John 13:34) Love is the only way to make true progress in this world, and it is the only thing that will heal the societal ills that currently plague us. Love is the only remedy for evil. Full stop.
Here’s the thing about love…It’s a package deal.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)
God graciously gives His children the very fruit of His being. This fruit comes to us as an impartation of His Spirit; and because God is love, I’ve come to think of the fruit of the Spirit as consisting entirely of love, which contains the other attributes as well. When we receive His love, we receive the whole package.
Take a moment and consider all that is going on in the world today. Now think about how often we are witnessing the fruit of the Spirit operating as a regular part of life. Are we seeing overwhelming patience or gentleness in any realm of society? Is self-control being exercised over social media or in civil discourse? Will most people say they are experiencing peace and joy in their personal lives? I’m going to guess that your answer is probably, Nope. And now we think we can cancel kindness to achieve justice? Sorry, not gonna happen.
And yet, we can’t produce this fruit by ourselves. As strong and capable as we may think we are, the fruit of the Spirit can only come from abiding in the one who is love. The world needs more, not less, of this fruit; and you and I are called to be a fruitful vine.
As we try to find solid ground in our turbulent world, we will find ourselves floundering if we neglect positive relational ideals such as kindness. Humans are relational beings with a need for genuine connection. Just imagine trying to form a relationship with someone who only holds negative ideals. They tell you everything they are passionately against but nothing that brings them joy or makes their heart soar. It would be difficult to form a bond with such a person.
And it is the same way in society. Finding unity in the things we oppose is not the same as showing compassion to one another and journeying together in hope toward a common purpose. Love is the tie that binds, and it is inseparable from the rest of the fruit — joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. So before we decide that we can do without these things because we have injustice in our sights, let us stop to consider what a world without such positive ideals would become. I don’t think many would choose such an existence.
And the choice is indeed given to us. Love is never forced upon us, for it would not then be love. Anarchy and nihilism will always find favor with some, but it is only love—the most excellent way— that wins in the end.
